The Addiction

I woke up this morning and immediately clicked on my instagram.  Yes before my prayers to God I clicked th Gram. *note to self, pray before social media* So, I see a picture (view the pic at the bottom of this blog) of a Korean family. The picture states:  "This Korean family would like to thank  black women for taking the money they could use to send their children to the best colleges and spending it on fake hair so we can send ours! Your insecurities and lack of racial pride has made us rich. You go girl!"
Oh boy! What a statement. What a picture. 
What a truth.
Growing up as a black little girl with short hair, my mother did the absolute best with my hair and her knowledge at the time. Cornrows. Single extensions. Relaxers. -_-
What I saw on tv was long, luxurious blonde hair. Why couldn't I have that?
So here you have a girl already wanting to change her natural God-given hair because of the world shoving their depiction of beauty down her throat. Fortunately I had a mom that made sure I knew I was beautiful.  By the time I reached teenager status and began picking my own hairstyles,  I just had to have weave!  Why? It was something I could use to feel beautiful! Sew-ins, quick weaves, braiding hair,  and wigs all became a necessary part of my life.
I began working at a beauty supply ran by a Korean husband and wife. The managers are causassian. While working there, my love for weave grew. I studied the different hair types and probably wasted a lot of money.
Although the money was leaving my hand and I knew it was dumb I kept doing it. Having silky hair to my waist was just enough. Then I ran into a woman wearing her natural hair.
No relaxer.
No weave.
No tracks. 
No sewn in beauty.
Her natural God-given tresses.
And she was beautiful.
So now my brain is in overload and I'm thinking,  "Wait, I can beautiful without weave?"
That thought began my natural hair journey in 2011. Which I have stopped and started over and over again due to lack of patience and a busy lifestyle; but that's another blog all together.
This thought also made me think.
When I buy toilet paper I am making someone else rich. When I buy food I'm paying someone else's bills. However, when I buy weave I am giving in to the social belief that black women cannot grow hair. Black women love weave. Black women need weave to be beautiful.  Our minds are so warped.
Now, I do not believe that buying weave makes you weak or insecure. I believe that spending your rent money for weave is pitiful. Selling your government assistance bridge card so you can get a 22" sew-in is low.  I saw these things while employed at the beauty supply.  And guess whose making the big bucks off your feeling of beauty? The picture says it all.
I wear my hair in its natural state, but who knows next week I may have a sew-in and there's nothing wrong with it. But never again will I be a slave to believing that I can only be beautiful with someone elses hair in my head.
Good day loves!